Finding the right person

Their are certain aspects in life that people feel uncomfortable discussing.  During my 19 years of life I have discussed many uncomfortable topics dealing with my disability.  Some topics include having trouble cutting my finger nails, being afraid to go out with friends because you cannot cut your food, or not going on class field trips to Six Flags because you can't handle all of the walking.

Keep in mind I do not feel regret for any of these scenarios I have just mentioned.  In fact, they give me insight on whether I can get get knocked down and still keep rising to my feet and go the distance.  However, I have heard stories recently on facebook about people having trouble maintaining relationships with a disability.

This scenario believe it or not, is  tougher for me to discuss then the three scenarios I have mentioned above.  Most of the comments deal with high school students trying to maintain a girlfriend who will accept them for their disability. In respect to privacy I will not mention any specific names. However, if you are reading this here is my best advice that I can give you.

First, never let your disability control who you really are as a person.  If a guy or a girl looks down on you because of your CP then they have a lot to learn as a person.  Do your best to stay calm, because this is your opportunity to help one more person understand what it is like to live with Cerebral Palsy.  Most of the time looks can be deceiving.  The person just may not understand what you are going through.

Next be confident about yourself.  Let the person whom you have feelings for know, that your disability is only one aspect of your life and it is not the only aspect of your life.  Tell them everything, even if it embarrasses you.  If the person truly care for you then they will understand and be able to look beyond the exterior aspects of your life.

Finally, if all else fails move on and surround yourself with people who truly care for you.  If he/she doesn't accept you for who you really are then they are not worth your time.  At times this will seem hard because you still have feelings for that particular person. However, eventually you will be able to move on and find someone even better.

When you are feeling upset try  talking to a good friend. I was going through this very problem when the oil spill happened in the Gulf of Mexico.  I was very upset because my then girlfriend had just broken up with me and it seemed like nothing was going right that day.

However, a good friend of mine Lauren Antal told me something that cheered me up.  She told me an old saying but added a twist.  Lauren said that "their are plenty of fish in the sea, but hurry up and grab them before the oil does."  I thought that was funny.  Remember this final thought.  Do not overlook the obvious.  The right person may be staring you right in the face, and you just don't see it.